Coming home is an interesting thing. Location, much like music, holds a memory in a capsule and unlocks it as you tread old steps or sit on familiar beaches. I have been struck by how powerful location has been during this visit. And perhaps because this is my first trip with our daughter, I’m more aware of it.
There have been plenty of joyful memories…I have spent so many happy years here! But this is also where my parents divorced and my life changed irrevocably because of it. So there has also been tremendous sadness as I navigate those memories and wonder what this trip could have been like if things had been different.
But things aren’t different. And I could get lost in all the “what ifs.” Comparison is absolutely a thief of joy and I don’t want to lose my joy while comparing to what could have been.
As my little family walked in front of me on the beach, I thought about how the hand of Redemption sweeps over the choices made by us and for us. And ultimately, it weaves the pain of what should have been with the sadness of what was and creates something new and beautiful.
JohannaSeptember 27, 2018 at 7:50 am
Beautiful words!! As I always think what could have been if my parents were still here and would have met my amazing niece and nephew; I’m reminded that they are always watching over us. My nephew has my dad’s middle name, and my niece was born on my mom’s birthday!! Pretty wonderful things!!